You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
