I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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