Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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