Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
