JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize