I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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