i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Randomize