No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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