Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Randomize
