I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
