The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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