Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
