mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
