just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
