This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
