So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
