At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Less talking, more tequila
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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