Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
