My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
