Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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