you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
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