it's too hot outside to masturbate.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
