since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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