That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Randomize
