Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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