Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
Randomize
