I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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