At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize