Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
