Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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