but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
