I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I deserve this hangover.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
