Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
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