I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
