I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
