I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize