please come you make the beer taste better
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
