I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
