i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
