i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Randomize
