I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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