she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
