Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
if you like me you must not know who I am
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Floor bacon is actually really good
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize