I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
