I must be too annoying 4 u.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
just tell him i said nine months
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
