i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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