we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize