i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
please come you make the beer taste better
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
