Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
