the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
