My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
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