haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
